I noticed something at the petrol station which may solve New Zealand’s electricity problems. Petrol is selling for $1.09 per litre, milk for $1.70, Coca-Cola for $1.77, and water for $2.08 (Unless you buy Infinity water which has “active hydrogen” and sells for $4.71 per litre).
So why are we filling up our dams with water when petrol is so much cheaper? We can get double use out of our petrol because at the bottom of the dam we can burn it to get even more electricity. Can’t do that with water (though I wonder about that active hydrogen).
The answer is obviously water-skiers. No matter how many signs you put up water-skiers will smoke cigarettes. And when one of them takes a tumble the nation’s electricity supply goes up in one mighty woof.
Still, milk is cheaper than water so we can use that. And at the bottom of the dam we can use it for milkshakes. But there is another bonus.
Milk, today, comes in two varieties – A1 and A2. A2 is more expensive than A1. I don’t know why. I’m sure it is not because they feed the A2 cows more expensive grass. The reason is probably because A2 milk is more healthy than A1.
Because it is healthier it sells for more to keep it out of the hands of poor people. The reason we don’t want poor people being healthy is that it prevents then from breeding more poor people. That’s bad for the economy.
Now we have a use for all the A1 cows that produce A1 milk. We can use their milk to fill up the dams. And poor people can have milkshakes at the bottom.
So everyone is happy. The electricity people are happy, the A1 cows are happy, poor people get milkshakes, and rich people are happy because the poor aren’t ruining the economy.